It was a chilly start to the day, 6:30am and I was on the road in full leathers to the N1 One-stop where we were going to meet up. Indicator had decided that the IUB boys were getting far to soft and he decided an Icicle Run would soon toughen us up. Arrived at the One-stop just before 7am and had a leisurely cup of coffee while waiting for Beetlejuice who had promised to be there early for coffee before starting the run. Bahaha! Indicator arrived before 7:30 and when he took his helmet off he was wearing what looked like a diving hood. His bike exhaust was still puffing long after he switched off. Obviously a Chesterfield Honda or the air was just bloody cold!
Beetlejuice arrived and asked where Indicator was. When he heard that he had gone to the toilets he mumbled something about being very brave and him not risking touching anything until his hands had defrosted. I immediately headed off to the toilets to prove how tough I was. Thankfully I had been warming my hands around a cup of coffee for 30 minutes. While I was away some cager told Beetlejuice and Indi that his car thermometer was registering zero degrees in the parking area and was wondering how we coped with the freezing cold. Beetlejuice assured them that we were too tough to notice and waited for them to leave before rushing wimpering into the Wimpy and ordering coffee.
We were ready to leave and Indi decided to roll down his diving hood. Beetlejuice and myself both dived sideways to get out of the line of fire as a cash in transit truck had just rolled up right behind him and after all the recent heists these guys are twitchy with their semi automatics when they see hooded thugs. Indi calmly finished getting ready and pretended not to even notice the muzzles pointing at him. Sheesh! Nerves of steel. No wonder IUB put him in charge of fighting.
Indi straight away made his intentions clear after we left the one stop. He set off at a cracking pace and appeared adamant to explore the boundaries of what his new bike could do. We chased him down and passed him, he wouldn’t be allowed to pass us on his first big bike run after he bought his Bluebird. IUB pecking order, see. We all had our turn. However he rudely ignored this unwritten rule and passed us again. We were doing 180 at the time and it was decision time, was I going to wimp out or did I have the balls to do 200 as we passed Paarl, a town notorious for speed traps on the highway. BeetleJuice made up my mind as he came past again, then realised his mistake as we all fell in line behind him to lead us through the danger zone without being able to be seen slowing down. Fortunately there were no coppers around, but I had to grin at his discomfort and obvious relief when we made it through safely.
We stopped at the Toll Plaza. Indi rode to the front and the rest of us were obviously expected to fall in behind him like the lemmings we are and await our turn. We’ve arranged for him to pay for everyone, so just to confuse the issue a bit more, I pulled in next to his Bluebird, with BeetleJuice pulling in next to me. All of a sudden there were three superbikes parked next to the window and the attendant made a brave attempt to stop trembling. She returned Indis card and the light went green - one of us could go. I took off in fine style and proceeded with a drag up to where I thought the 1/4 mile mark would be. My time was nine seconds. Eat that.
When I looked around proudly, I was treated to a perfect wheelie as BeetleJuice got the green light. He’s obviously had some practice as it looked as if he had some measure of control (no more bouncing arms and legs) - a vast improvement on some of his earlier attempts I was fortunate enough to witness. I was half expecting a cargo net to fall from the roof of the Toll Plaza to arrest Indi and force us to give ourselves up, which we would have done, naturally. Baahaahaa!
We then made a dash for the tunnel entrance. There was a booming TL right behind me as BeetleJuice tried in vain to make it backfire inside the tunnel, which would have been a treat what with plaster falling off the walls and doomsday sirens going off. His shenanigans draw a quick reaction from the sensors in the tunnel and the notice boards started flashing “Please slow down to 90, asswipe.” I know BeetleJuice hates it when notice boards call him asswipe, but he probably didn’t see it through his tinted visor. It was nice and warm inside the tunnel and I looked for a place to stop, but there were none.
On the other side of the tunnel, I dialed in ludicrous speed instead of ridiculous speed by accident, and had to hold on as we blasted down the mountain pass at, er ludicrous speed. That road is made for superbikes doing ludicrous speeds. There weren’t much traffic on the road and it being a dual-carriageway we could use both lanes to make rapid progress. I felt like Haga as I was able to pick braking points and racing lines through each corner, getting off the seat like the racer that I am. Red lining in every gear and as I hooked fourth and the speedo went past 200, I tucked in and concentrated on the job at hand, trying to shake off bloody BeetleJuice. He has just got far too arrogant since he bought the TL and seems to think he’s a racer too. We flashed past startled motorists with wide eyed kids on Sunday drives in their station wagons and only slowed down close to Worcester when the sun was coming up right in front of us.
Indi was being sensible first time with us on the Bluebird and had no problems with us taking off and leaving him behind when we got to the twisty parts.
We stopped at the Worcester one-stop to haul out sun glasses and decided to go straight through De Doorns instead of the usual route through Robertson. On the pass on the other side of De Doorns a large truck had slid off the road and was blocking both lanes. So much for Montague in time for breakfast. A police block was set up and we waved at the cop as we slid past him and headed to the front where all the action was. Unfortunately it was on a part of the mountain with a rock wall one side and a steep cliff on the other and we had no way of getting past even on bikes until the mess was cleared. After watching the truck being winched back onto the road by two monster truck tow vehicles we slipped through a gap and made the most of a clear road that had been blocked off for at least 30 mins.
Finding the turnoff to Montague we cranked it up until I saw the sign which said 70km to Montague. Sheeit! I had been counting on a far shorter distance and was running low on fuel. We slacked off to about 140 and was doing ok until about 25 kms down the road I had to switch over to reserve. Two litres left at 10km/l and still 40 odd km’s to go. Damn! Stopped at a small shop with a fuel pump but of course it was Sunday morning. Church. No-one home. OK time to go into serious fuel saving mode. We were heading up a mountain pass and I was counting on a 30km freewheel down the other side into Montague.
Just over the top there was a nice hairpin bend covered in flour with people everywhere. Another truck had gone off the road but this time straight over the side of a cliff and down about 300m The truck was flat on the bottom with a stream of flour down the side of the mountain marking it’s descent. It looked like a cardboard box that had been flattened. We stopped so Beetlejuice could load up his bike with free flour and admire the view.
Rode the rest of the way freewheeling down every incline I could find and barely made it into Montague. My 17 litre tank took 17.67 litres so I reckon the float bowls were almost sucked dry too. I noticed Indicators new bumper sticker - “sorry did I just overtake you” on the back of his Blackbird and was glad that I had run out of petrol the first time I got to read it. Must get a T-shirt that says “If you can read this I’m taking a piss”
We headed off to the restaurant at the end of Route 62 where we had Route 62 and Route 66 breakfasts. Beetlejuice had a little bit of crumpet on the side but the waitress was obviously so taken by us handsome biker types that she offered Indicator and myself a bit of crumpet with our breakfast as well. Damn friendly is all I can say.
I started smearing tomato sauce from a little dish on my breakfast bacon and eggs and then put on my best disgusted face and said “bloody strawberry jam looked just like tomato sauce” Beetlejuice and his sweet tooth immediately grabbed the bowl and was about to cover his crumpet when he stopped and got a suspicious look on his face. Damn! He tasted it and immediately tried to climb over the table and start a fight. Almost ruined his crumpet. Don’t mess with Beetlejuice and his cake. The only person I know who can order Lemon Merangue for breakfast.
After the necessary photo’s of my bike outside we decided to head off towards Port Elizabeth via Swellendam and then back to Firlands in time for tea. This is a wonderful stretch of road and we made good time with Beetlejuice right on my tail for the first half. The sun was shining blah blah blah and the slowest corner over that pass was about 180km/h. We overtook a few cars and one bakkie which Beetlejuice said his clock was reading just over 260km/hr when we passed it. Seems like Beetlejuice had made the same mistake I made earlier and dialed in Ludicrious speed on the TL. About halfway I moved over so Beetlejuice could trawl for speed traps for a while again (he fell for it again AGAIN!!).
This is another great stretch of road for high speed runs. Last time Beetlejuice and myself came through this way I gave him a close up demo of a high speed power slide as my tire was almost worn through to the canvas (see feb Freedom road rally report) so this time I made the most of fresh D207 rubber. It seems like Beetlejuice was trying hard to power slide his New BT56s and prove his TL was almost up to my FZR in power, performance, looks, handling etc. etc. and we were grinning from ear to ear when we stopped at the 4way stop in Swellendam.
Indicator was right behind us and as he pulled up a cop came flying around the other corner and headed up the pass obviously investigating reports of hooligan bikers. We hadn’t seen any hooligans ourselves of course. Once again Indi showed his nerves of steel and calmly lit up a smoke. Fortunately the cop didn’t seem to have seen us or he was waiting for backup so while Indi was puffing away I went around the back of the Bluebird to make sure the bumper sticker was still on.
The road back to Caledon is a wonderful bit of N2 with more fast sweeps and we averaged about 180km/hr to Caledon where we filled up. Once again the locals checked out the speedo’s and were impressed at the top speeds. (We wish hehe. I must get a mph sticker for the speedo, 300mph should really impress the locals) Beetlejuice impressed them with tales of our riding and fighting while we filled up and then it was back onto the last stretch to Firlands for a beer.
As I went past the Hermanus turn off the cops were unpacking laser traps from the back of a cop car and I hoped that Indi and Beetlejuice were going to make it past before they had finished setting up as once again they were dawdling behind admiring the view. We had a beer at the Firlands and headed home after a great run. It was nice doing a high speed run for a change and we had a great day. Thanks guys.
Total distance for me was 522 km’s. Around 6 hours including the potjie we made along the way while we waited for the Blackbird. Next ride we goto Knysna for breakfast.
Tags: Trip reports
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